“Some days, I think I’ll never catch up. I’ll never catch up on laundry, dishes, errands, cleaning… That used to get to me, until I was okay with not being Super Mom. Today I felt joy… I felt joy as I rocked our son to sleep, and again as I read to Neva as she fell asleep snuggled up next to me… and again when my husband kissed me goodnight.
I spent a while organizing the living room, tonight. Once I was finally done, I sat on the clean floor and cried. I cried, because I’m going to miss this…
- I’m going to miss the asparagus, rice and carrots that fell from Joey’s high chair and mixed into the toys on the floor.
- I’m going to miss constantly making sure Neva didn’t leave any little toys around that Joey could choke on.
- I’m going to miss the yogurt finger prints all over the couch, and the Cheerios under every piece of furniture.
- I’m going to miss my babies needing me next to them, so they can fall asleep.
It may look like a mess, but to me, it is: The 15 books Neva asked me to read to them today, the arts and crafts we made together, their imaginations going wild, and enjoying every second of it. Tomorrow, we will start again…
One day, before we know it, we will only have a small toy box for our grandkids that I will lug out every now and again… and I’ll tell my kids when they try to help clean it up before they leave, that it’s OK—I can do it. I’ll do it and I will cry just like I did tonight; because it will seem like only yesterday, that I was picking up their toys…”